Nice gory subject ✨Hemoptysis✨

If you were on Instagram at approximately twenty past midnight last night, then you probably noticed I put up several (rather calm surprisingly) stories up about how I was coughing blood.

Now, this is a pretty common thing among those CF so nothing to be massively concerned about although needless to say, it’s not particularly pleasant. It’s basically where the small capillaries in the lungs burst and consequently bleed, the body obviously needs to rid this blood and the only way to do that is coughing.

This has happened many a time for me, usually after a bout of vigorous physio or exercise so again nothing to be scared of... however, there have been traumatic times (she says after waving it off “yeah nah no worries, it’s all fine, picture of health” pffftttt).

The first time this happened, it was about a day since we got back from the school ski trip (I was 15 at the time). That key word might ring your bells about altitude and climatization etc. SO, that evening, I was coughing and noticed an uncomfortable bubbling and wheezing in my chest which soon became more apparent when I was bringing up streaks of blood. This had spooked me a bit given it hadn’t happened before. Both mum and dad were very much in favour of going to the hospital because it was definitely not normal but understandably, I really did not want to go as that makes it farrrr too real with the realisation of “ah shoot, this is an actual problem that needs fixing”.

Anyway, it kept happening and it seemed to be getting worse so very reluctantly, I let mum drive me to the local hospital. (I’ll add that this was during my *big word* Mycobacterium Abscessus Nontuberculous treatment where I was in for 2-4 weeks every 3 months for 18 months). I can’t recall why we went to the inpatient ward rather than actual A&E; I suppose it’s one of those being unable to coherently think and make decisions due to the intensity of stress and panic.

The doctor looked me over and weirdly at this point all the blood seemed to have ceased; in hindsight that was probably me desperately trying not to cough in an attempt to be sent home. It seemed to work as I basically begged mum to let us go home in which she cautiously agreed but as we were filling the discharge papers, the nurse looked at me and hastily said “are you sure you’re okay?”. At which point I welcomed defeat and let out an ALMIGHTY hacking spewing blood everywhere. I remember this really vaguely as I kind of just blocked out the entire experience as best I could, but I kid you not, from what I can recall, blood was dripping down my face and my clothes, it was all over my hands, splattered across the taps and sink. I remember looking up and seeing the doctors jaw drop, just flat out gaping at me in complete shock, this was another kind reminder that I was indeed, in a spot of bother (to put it lightly).

If you’ve ever seen The Woman in Black, then you might remember the little girl that drank the lye and vomited blood? That was literally me, I was that girl on this fateful night except I didn’t die, and it wasn’t a phantom that made me do it out of revenge for her deceased child (although that would’ve been way more interesting). We were coincidently watching that film earlier yesterday evening before it happened which is super weird 0_o

(I'll put the pictures at the bottom so they can be avoided if so wished)

This blood just kept coming so I was cannulated and kept in overnight. I was in complete disbelief, just got back from a fantastic week spent with my friends, had barely been back in the country for 12 hours and I’m already laid in a hospital ward surrounded by flashing lights and endless beeping.

That was definitely the worst episode of it but as it was the first, I then expected all other instances of it to be that bad (which they weren’t apart from once). Thankfully it was never so bad that they needed to intervene with an *another big word* Endovascular Embolization, where if I remember correctly, they shove a catheter in your groin and up into your lungs (that probably might have been necessary the first time but was a bit too late to do so).

So yes, that’s my little anecdote for today, fairly traumatic as experiences go for the average 15-year-old haha. I’d say it’s only minimally contributed to my personality and constant state of nervousness and anxiety as well as my fear of being in high altitude for an extended period of time but as the kids say these days, we move ooo ✌🏻

❗️Bloody photos below so please don't scroll further if that's not your thing❗️